Question) My child has a hard time sitting still – should I be worried?

Answer by Early Childhood Specialist from Building Healthy Minds and Happy Families:

Answer) Asking children to sit still for a long period of time is unnatural. Children need to move, and for much more than just a few minutes on the playground every day. It is more than just a need to expend energy, it’s necessary for the strengthening of their bodies, for balance, and for sensory development.

That being said, if a child’s fidgeting is affecting significant areas of his life it may be time to look at it a little more closely:

1. Is the attention span age appropriate? The amount of a time a child can stay focused on a task is age dependent. For example, a 2 year old’s attention span is on average about six minutes long and a 3 year old can focus for about 10 minutes on one activity. As they get older these time frames increase very gradually.
2. Determine if the child’s behavior is seen in multiple settings e.g. at home and at school. If it’s only seen in one specific situation, look for other reasons why they’re having trouble sitting still.
3. Consider the reasons behind their restlessness – are they getting adequate physical activity every day, is there something bothering them, are they seeking attention, are the activities of interest to them, and are the expectations realistic?

There are several ways of improving a child’s attention span and it’s beneficial to do so as it promotes learning and academic success. The most effective way of increasing focused attention is engaging with the child one-on-one.

• For a few minutes every day, eliminate distractions (for you and for the child) and play with one toy at a time or do an activity that interests him, giving him your complete attention.

• Limit accessibility to other toys at this time and re-direct his attention to the toy/activity at hand.

• Demonstrate different ways of playing with one thing, using imagination and creativity.

• Gradually increase the allotted time for this exercise every day.
• Incorporate the “sitting still” requirements throughout the day. For example, encourage your child to stay seated at the dining table during dinner by engaging him in stories or fun games.

• Reading books of interest are another way to help your child stay seated. Engage him in the story by asking questions, pointing out pictures etc, making connections with the world around him.

• Make sure that he isn’t bored. If children aren’t stimulated enough they seek out other means to keep themselves entertained.

In addition, keep the following in mind:

-        Limiting the amount of screen time is essential. The stimulation that video games or T.V. shows provide is about the pacing, how fast the scene changes every few minutes, or how quickly you reach the next stage, and if a child’s mind gets habituated to that pace, they will quickly get bored of his surroundings.

-        Sensory activities are equally important for children who have a harder time staying still. Using play dough (without any tools), finger paint or sand play help them calm their bodies. Turn on soothing music in the background and be present with your child.

-        Make time for them to play outdoors for at least an hour every day. Physical exercise improves cognitive control i.e. the ability to pay attention. The neural circuitry of the brain is enhanced during goal directed activities on the playground e.g. swinging across monkey bars, resulting in simultaneous mental and physical development of children.

If you still have concerns about your child’s attention span consult your pediatrician or an early childhood developmental professional.

See more parenting strategies on the blog at www.sara-zaidi.com/parenting-blog

Sara Zaidi is a child therapist and the creator of Building Healthy Minds and Happy Families. With advanced degrees in psychology and mental health and over ten years of clinical experience, Sara helps parents navigate through the challenging early stages of their children’s lives by explaining the cognitive, emotional and social development of children from a neurological and behavioral perspective.